The 5 Stages of Grief: Dealing With Loss

The 5 Stages of Grief: Dealing With Loss

At some point in your life, you will have to deal with loss. Take the recent devastation surrounding the Tsunamis that hit South Asia. With over 150,000 reported deaths, as a result of this natural disaster, many lives have been and will continue to be affected by loss for many years to come. There is also the loss many families worldwide are dealing with as the result of the war on terror. It is at this time, many of us find ourselves grappling with the why’s and how’s of loss.

When loss of a loved one, job, material possessions or faith strikes us, it can not only be overwhelming, but may cause us to act out in ways that seem to be against our nature – or does it? Truly understanding the grief and bereavement process helps us to deal with loss and move through it.

There are considered to be five stages that human beings go through when we suffer a loss. They are:

* Denial – characterized by refusing to believe what has happened and feelings of shock

* Anger – the accusing stages or time of blaming oneself or others for what has happened

* Bargaining – asking God, the universe or a supreme being to “cut a deal” with you and return things to the way they were before the loss took place

* Depression – feelings of listlessness or exhaustion combined with helplessness, guilt and lack of interest in life

* Acceptance – the ability to face the loss and move on, returning to setting goals in your life and being able to focus your energy more positively

Regardless of the size or scope of loss you experience, each one of these emotional stages will be hit. While there is no definite way to determine how you or someone else will deal with loss, be mindful that your grieving process is your own. If you find difficulty in moving through any phase of loss, the help of a professional grief counselor is advised as well as the use of tools to aid in your grieving process.

One such tool I have found is an amazing book called: “How to Survive the Loss of a Love” by Peter McWilliams, Harold H. Bloomfield, Melba Colgrove. This book was put together with such love and caring for the human spirit, I recommend keeping a copy of it in your personal library to pull out when needed. This book details the stages of grieving from both a practical and emotional standpoint with explanations on why we feel the way we feel about various types of loss, along with beautifully written poems that aid in the expression of those feelings.

In the end, the realization that there is an end, and definitely a light at that end to be embraced, gives way to the tremendous well of hope at the heart of the human spirit. It’s one of the many miracles that we carry around with us wherever we go and exists within a thought’s reach. Be well, be blessed and be healed in whatever manner suits you always remembering that dawn will follow the darkest hour.